Hard to believe it is now ten years (September 13th) that my little Laura passed away. Sometimes it seems and feels as though it was only yesterday. Has it gotten easier? Sometimes… I can’t say that I hurt the way I did many years ago. I think some of the most difficult times for me are when I am having the most fun. Ironic isn’t it? Perfect examples are when I’m boogie boarding and I wish she was with me to play in the water or when I see something totally spectacular or amazing like the perfect sunset or the fountains at Bellagio or a day at Disney and sometimes just having a meal with my parents in Italy … I wish she was still living and breathing … and right there with us.
I often wonder what she would look like now, who would she be dating? I would probably talk her out of marrying for a while so she could explore and experience some of life’s magical moments. I wonder what she would have majored in. A doctor perhaps? A teacher? A healer? She was always the giving type. And in her own way as I have always said, she was a great teacher already.
I wrote about Laura for the first time a year ago. I had never shared with so many my own personal thoughts about my experience. I just read my original post from a year ago. So many of the feelings are still the same. If you would like to read it you can at https://franksd.wordpress.com/2008/09/13/september-13-1999/
A friend once told me that the sad memories are replaced by the happy memories. And this is true. I will always have the memories of the fun and joyful things we did together and they will stay with me forever in my heart.
I will always remember the time she was born and how little she was in my arms and how I never imagined in a million years that she would only be with us for a short time and then I also remember how I carried her in my arms from her room down the stairs to the stretcher to be taken away to the funeral home…
I deeply miss Laura. I always wonder in hindsight if I would have done things differently had I known how short our time together would be. I may have made a couple of decisions that would have kept us closer (distance wise) but more importantly I know it has changed how I do things now. I do my best not to take things for granted. I know life is precious and short and at any given moment someone near us may not be here again tomorrow or later today. What if I wasn’t here tomorrow? Stephen Covey wrote that we should live our lives with the end in mind. I think I understand this more than ever before. Treasure what is important to you today. Live life knowing what is important. If you aren’t sure about what is important or what is of value to you, then take time to discover this.
One thing is certain, there will come a time when we will pass on. And whether we believe that life continues in the heavens above or there are places we go to after death or that nothing happens, that time will come and we will not only discover the truth about what happens in the afterlife but on that final day of our life here on this earth we will have to answer the question: “Have I done what I came here to do? Have I fulfilled my life’s mission?” I hope you live your life with no regrets and that it abounds in love. I know Laura in her short time with us lived an exceptional life and touched the lives of so many people with so much love. I am blessed to be where I am today and am thankful for my family and friends.
Blessing to you all.